“Oh Say, Can You See?”

4:00 AM — Wide awake, damn this West Coast time. Little do I know Frank is just getting back to his room about now. Sleep off and on until 5:30. Up, shower, and pack for another day on the high sees — we are going high in the mountains, and I wants to sees if SLEPE 63 runs hot again. 6:00 AM — check out, write postcards for children and trek out to prep SLEPE 63 for the day. Frank ready, too. Little sleep must agree with him. SLEPE 63 ready, Frank ready. Drew Hardin says fewer cars and longer distances today — we must use buddy system in case of breakdown. Looks like Sadie Hawkins day as everyone lines up a buddy. SLEPE 63 very popular — everyone wants to be her date. We finally agree to buddy with Chuck and Chris in Callaway LeMans Corvette — only one in existence. B F Goodrich/Super Shops giving the car away at Norwalk to some (un)lucky winner. Too bad it’s not a Mustang, I might enter then. Deal is we get present because tomorrow is Mothers® day. Await gifts from other Tourers.

Wait at gas stops every hundred miles to let others catch up. SLEPE 63 may be a hot car, but she isn’t running hot today. At second stop we find throngs of humanity waiting to see Tour cars. We are, of course, first. They tell us they drove 175 miles to sit in gas station all day for the chance to see actual cars. I think I will wait for cable TV movie.

Up mountains, down mountains. Most spectacular views I have ever seen — especially semi truck in front of us careening down mountain and around corners with brakes which we can smell from 2 miles back. We are not gaining on truck — don’t know why he wastes time with brakes. Shoot many slides of view for others to see. See cars and pick-ups (many, many, pick-ups — must be official Utah vehicle) on shoulders, overpasses and ramps. They wave. We wave. We wonder what kind of life a person has to sit on shoulder of road all day for 5 second glimpse of car. Suddenly glad WE don’t live in Utah.

Arrive in Grand Junction — we are the first. Bell Hop runs out of hotel to be the first to welcome us to Grand Junction, and to ask if he can PLEASE have the honor of carrying our luggage. We burst his bubble. Power is an awesome weapon to wield. Check in — have reserved parking places, so Callaway and SLEPE 63 get spaces one and two. I con guard into letting us wash car. Other cars start arriving — they line up to wash also. Guard gets like Grumpy Old Men. We are only car washed. Others claim conspiracy — we acknowledge complaints with chorus of na na na na na na!

Car clean — EVERYONE else jealous. We beat hasty retreat to airport to pick up Dennis before other participants throw dead bugs on SLEPE 63. 6:15 PM Arrive at airport — looks like two gates. Security guard offers to trade us his pick-up for our car if we fix exhaust system and get new plug wires to cure rough idle. Tell him I would like to, but I don’t have any spare cash to throw in deal. He walks away sad. Frank and Forrest laugh out loud. Real loud. Now we know where Rhodes Scholars go when they retire — to Grand Junction or White House.

Frank runs in airport to check on Dennis — ticket agent says flight arrives at 7:15 PM. We go to eat, will return for Dennis and to let Frank depart. Applebee’s crowded — four persons in line ahead of us. Server says never seen it this crowded before — must be all those fancy cars. Go to Pizza Hut next door. No wait. Order pizza. Eat pizza. Hear knock at window — figure it is homeless Grand Junction citizen. It is hotel-less, car-less Dennis, who has WALKED from airport down food row, asking all who will answer if they have seen SLEPE 63. Come to find out Dennis arrived earlier than we thought, and walked out of terminal as we were driving away. Security guard who we rejected on vehicle trade sent him our direction. Dennis thirsty, hungry. Forrest embarrassed. Not too much though as I have keys to SLEPE 63. Eat food. Talk. Eat. Talk. Frank notices it is 7:25 PM, and his plane leaves at 7:40 PM. We hot foot it back to airport. Must have missed rush hour somehow. Frank tucks and rolls and we slow in front of terminal. Hope he made plane. Guess we’ll find out in eight more days.

New co-driver Dennis and I return to hotel and masses of humanity. Seas part as SLEPE 63 drives in. Parking place number two still there. We are God-like figures to these people. Everyone still jealous of car’s cleanliness. Give tips and pointers to those trying to clean cars. See woman spraying Wheel Mist® Multi Purpose on wheels of purple Z-28. No water to rinse off, so I ask what she’s going to do. Nothing, she says. Suggest it’s not in best interest of wheels. She keeps on doing it. Typical Chevy owner, I guess.

Dennis meets driver of Jet computer chips Impala SS Wagon. Most cool ride — turns out they have many friends in common, and frequent same places in Huntington Beach, CA. Is this a small world, or what? Give out product. Talk up product. Look at Bubbas and Bubbettes looking at us. No one has a life in Grand Junction on this Saturday night!

High school prom going on. See many couples in tuxedos and formals walking around looking at cars. Must have a DJ playing disco, I surmise. Darkness comes. We go. Driver meeting at 8:30 AM for drive to Denver suburbs tomorrow. Maybe I’ll get chance for Callaway drive. Think not, though.

Story and photos by,

Forrest Tosie
Mothers® Polishes•Waxes•Cleaners